Joy

I know the song's cliche and cheesy but it's the first thing I went to when I got back to the house today. And the lyrics are what I'm feeling and the music works for writing - or reading - this blog entry.

Revisiting longtime friends, catching up on life, reminiscing about shared experiences from our past. After twelve years away, this trip to Portland has provided me so much. Many of the stories I've told - or will tell - in this blog will center around this city and what happened during those formative years I spent here in the '90s. But today is about... today.

Jako & I attending a Youth & HIV event
in Washington D.C. in 1995

The moment I confirmed my Portland trip, I let Jako know I was coming. And there was no way we would pass up the opportunity to meet up during my stay. We didn't know how or where or when but we knew it would happen. And as remiss as I was at scheduling time with everyone, there were a few must-see's on my list... and Jako was one of them. We've been friends since 1992 and have both been living with HIV for 21 years which gives us this shared common bond. And, as she once said, it's like I'm her brother from another mother.

2010 - Fifteen years later and smiling even bigger!

Shortly before my departure date, her husband Chris and she asked if I'd like to join them on their sailboat for an afternoon. Hell yes! Oh, sorry. I mean, "Yes, that would be wonderful. Thank you for asking!" The offer itself was very thoughtful but they went even further by allowing me to bring a few of my friends to join the adventure. With so many friends in Portland, I found it difficult to decide who to ask. But like most difficult decisions, the answer came when I wasn't even thinking about it. Ena, Julie and their boys Aiden & Emmett. We all knew each other. Ena, Jako and I are long term HIV activists/advocates who all worked together back in the day. Ena & Julie's wedding was the first same-sex ceremony that I ever attended... what was it, 1996? Julie & Ena hadn't met Chris & Jako's daughter. Chris & Jako hadn't met Ena & Julie's sons. And I hadn't met any of the kids.

And the idea of having three sailing mates who were six, eight & twelve years old sold me on it. The kids would bring a sense of excitement & wonder & fun & playfulness that we adults may have been hard-pressed to find on our own.

When I woke up this morning, the sky was overcast and the mercury low. I think I even felt a few drops of rain as I sipped my coffee on the porch. None of that was going to dampen my excitement. Although I'd seen Ena for coffee on Wednesday, I hadn't seen Julie during this trip or met the boys yet. And Jako and I had seen each other two years ago but I've only met Chris once and for years now have been waiting to meet the beautiful girl they call "Biancastella." As I packed my bag, I added an extra thermal shirt and a hat. I donned a hoodie and chose sneakers instead of flip-flops. Wasn't going to let some gray skies and chilly breezes have any chance to affect our adventure.

Then as we drove to the marina - the sun broke through, the clouds burned off, the air warmed. The day had gone from pleasant to gorgeous in only a few short minutes. When I got to the dock, I realized my excitement didn't even come close to matching that of Aiden's & Emmet's; probably because they'd never been sailing. Knowing we would be there to watch them experience it for the first time made the trip even more special.

I'll share the photos. But I don't want to share the experience. That is for the eight of us to keep for ourselves. Plus what we shared today was... well, it was indescribable. Beauty. Adventure. Laughter. Lessons. Food. Playfulness. Friendship. Innocence. Memories. Breezes. Music. Teamwork. Family. Amazement. Hugs. Splendor.

Perfection.

We spend so much of our time working and cleaning and running around. Doing chores and paying bills. Driving here and flying there. Sitting in front of the television or navigating our way through crowded malls. Eating on the go or drinking a few pains away.

But there are always moments that remind us it's all worth it.

That remind us of the reason we're really here.

Today was one of those moments.

And it wasn't about sailing.

It wasn't about relaxation.

It wasn't about pleasure.

It was about family. And friends. And love.

It was about joy.